September 2009
“I just can’t erase you from my past. I just can’t delete you from my...”
– unknown
all at once
falling asleep with the fray on. thinking about how I want to be close with people but I choose not to be. people let you down or worse I let them down. sometimes you need that moment to push people away and just go down this road alone. doesn’t mean you love them less just means your losing yourself. I hate feeling list and I feel this way so much. I blame myself but also many people...
start over again
Is it to late to try? It was by fault alone.
Goooodnight Moon.
“You miss 100% of the shots you never take.”
– Wayne Gretzky
closer to fine
Everyday i’m closer to fine who I am. Yet then again I’m losing myself along the way. I keep falling down. I’m closer to fine that I’m losing everything I want. I’m giving up before trying. I’m so confused. I seem to find myself on a path of lies and pain. I only have myself to blame. I keep think your so close I can almost grab your hand and I feel so...
“Everything has an effect.
Something so big, could end of being so small, so...”
– unknown.
break down the walls
What does it mean to grow up? To take responsibility for your own actions? Even when it’s not your fault? Does it mean to be the only one standing and taking the punishment? I’m starting to grow up and get lovely wrinkles and black bags under my eyes from lack of sleep. Is this growing up? Where do I go after high school or even after college? It will be a fresh chapter in my...
underneath the surface
I finally know what I want to do with my life. It’s taken so long to realize too. I want to see my world. I want to meet every single person breathing on this earth. The good and the bad. The rich and the poor. I want to give everyone a hug or a handshake and I want to make someone’s life a little easier. I want to be a totally different person. I want to change people’s...
hit bottom
I’ll just leave it at ——I’ve been better.
“I’d have to tell him everything, I knew that. I’d have to explain it right, so...”
– n/a.
the stars and moon
I’m lonely. I have no one to turn too at the moment. I’m tired and have so muchc to say but no one to say it too. I also get mad too quickly, and I can’t manage to keep the sheets on the bed! I shut down way to quickly and give up way to easily. I get lost and confused like every minute of the day. I clingy as hell and I hate when people leave without returning. Goodbyes forever...
unsaid
I’m already stressing out with school. We have so much to do as seniors, plus it’s very expensive just to be one too. I don’t want to go to the prom but they won’t me to pay for a package that comes with a prom ticket. I don’t want or need this package. Thanks. My Psychology teacher says something that bugs me. He says that woman don’t need an...
blessed be.
Patrick Swayze. You’re loved and will always be remembered in those hearts. Rest in peace.
“So fail, be bad at things, be embarassed. Be afraid. Be vulnerable. Go out on a...”
goodnight moon
My emotions are mixed right now. I can’t feel anything…I’m so tired I can’t even think cleary. I miss you. I don’t know what to do. I’m sad and so confused. I don’t get what people see sometimes. I need to stop seeing the bad things. Life is beautiful, people can be beautiful. Everyone has a story to tell. Everyone has traveled on one road or...
why continue?
When I look in the mirror my past comes flying back. Things that make me cry and wish I could change. As I get older and finally started my senior year I have to learn that a regret and a mistake are totally different. I have to take everything I’ve done and make it apart of me. I have to walk tall and realize this is me and you can probably break me but I’ll still continue. ...
my world is falling apart
There isn’t a day that goes by where I don’t, at some point, think of you. You gave me some much and took away even more. You took one thing that I can never ever get back. You were my family. My only hope to believe there was good in this world. I trusted you and I loved you. You were mine to keep and hold. You abused that. I fell alone now… Where do I go? I sit and think. Why am...
can't find my way
Throughout life we meet some many people. Everyone is unlike the other. One person will be there forever. This one will understand in a way that no one would. You’ll never feel alone or sad anymore. This one person will lift you up. They will love you like no other. You’ll love them back. Goodbyes are truly hello’s. Love. A soul mate. You look in his eyes and just know...
“I’ve told you many times that you’re worth so much better. I don’t understand...”
– unknown
A cloudy chance
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.
i’m tired.
day two.
One step closer to being done with high school.
To Do List.
-Eat dinner.
-Pick clothes out for tomorrow.
-Add new dividers in my binder. I hate the fact that teachers can’t share a damn binder. Sharing is caring isn’t it?
-Brush teeth and wash face
-Watch Supernatural.
-Bed.
Oh I’m so exciting :)
Much Love
fly away
And here it goes again. You get that feeling when you see him. You know he moved on for good and you know you NEED to move but you see his eyes and you remember all the great times you had. All the laughs, tears, hopes and dreams. In his eyes you feel warm and safe. You just want to feel his arms around you once more. Then….you see her. You see her all over him and he tries not to...
I'll be there.
If you need me, I’ll be there. If you want me, I’ll be there. If you need a friend, I’ll be there. If you need a shoulder to cry on, you can count on me. If you need to scream and shout. Yell at me. If you need advice, I may not the right words to say but I’ll be there. If you need to walk on the beach with someone I’m there. If you need to just runaway...
bittersweet my friend.
What makes you better then me? What makes you better then anyone in this world? You must really think your on the top of the mountain because you sure act like it. Your not better than me. Your not even on my level of respect. I don’t respect you or even like you. I don’t even pitty you.
can't take another day
Old friends. New friends. No friends. Life is blah blah blah. Everyone has their own opinions on life.
The past. If you CHOOSE to remember all the negative and bad things your day will suck. Your past will be a big all of negativity. You can move on because your wishing you could have or wish you fixed something. Does every minute seems the same to you? I sit around and think about...
“Have you ever been in love? Horrible isn’t it? It makes you so vulnerable....”
– unknown.
day one.
So Day one of senior year has be checked off. Getting a memeber from The Cab to reply is also checked off. Although I think Bryan either hates me or thinks I hate him? It’s also funny because when he replied he said I’m the only one who didn’t care about what he said…I don’t believe this….I’m sure all the little The Cab haters don’t care. ...
The life of a sleep deprived teen
Spelling on deprived? As I sit here listening to Mayday Parade thinking people must think Im seriously stupid. Hey maybe when it comes to you I am. You had me fooled but no more. Go suck yourself. It’s time I live my own life and cone out of the shadows.
Your seriously something. You were all I wanted. Now your all I want to get away from.
After a very long day of shopping and...
burn baby
I wish I knew all the words to say to make everything okay. I wish I knew how your feeling so I knew how to make it better. I don’t. I’ve got nothing. I’m trying to be strong enough for the both of us but I can’t be. Then one day, I came to you and you didn’t help me. You have no wisdom, no sympathy. It’s like we’ve drifted apart from each other. ...
I never felt this way before
I look in your eyes and I see freedom. I look in your eyes and I know I’m safe. I’m safe from the judgement and the hatred. I look in your eyes and I know I’m home. I know that with you is where I belong. Your mine and I’m yours. Together tangled in one another. Walking side by side smiling because we’ve found each other. You give me the strength to...
earn it
You have to earn everything in life. Well, that’s what I think. You have to earn a friendship. You don’t just sit by someone and never talk and BAM your best friends. Nope, you have to show them your heart. Show them that your there for them at 3 am when their car breaks down or they had a bad break up. You have to earn their trust and they do the same. You have to earn your...
your only a kid
I was eating dinner with my mom at Kat and Dave’s. Lovely place. It started to get packed. ALL these kids started to come. I love kids sometimes but not when they are loud and all in your face when you don’t even know them. I was telling my mom, “gosh, i dislike kids.” Her reply to this was your a kid. I felt the need to start a fight about this. HA. I’m not a...
