tired of people. tired of feeling like i’ll never belong or that i’m not good enough. i hate feeling like i’m a wasted person. i’m down in my luck and it’s like a spell that’s been here since i entered middle school. i don’t know who I am but what if i never find that out?
“i love you and i probably always will, but we go days without having meaningful conversations. and i used to miss you so much when that happened. but it never seemed like you missed me, and i guess because of that, i stopped missing you.”—one tree hill
here’s the thing. i’m not going to lie and say i’m over you because i’m not all for that ‘pretend like your okay’ act. i wear my emotions on my sleeve and when i’m happy, i’m happy and when i’m sad, i’m sad. i say what i mean, i’m straight forward. there’s no cracking the code involved or solving. what you see is what you got.
Why do I find it so hard to let go? Why do I have such a difficulty accepting the inevitable, dealing with what’s right in front of me - why can’t I get over something I can do nothing to change? I guess I just hope too much. Hope for the best, hope that we meet again, hope that he gets everything he deserves <3, hope that all his dreams come true. There’s a fine line between faith and naivety, sometimes I’m overwhelmed to see that line and so blindly cross it.
The sad truth is, people change. We’ve been changing since the day we were born. Think about it, you didn’t always like barbie dolls. You did for a while, then you didn’t. You didn’t always drink alcohol, but now you do. You changed. & this changing will continue all through our lives, people we think we know will change & we’ll find we don’t really know them that well anymore. We’ll grow out of loving people, and grow out of hating people too. It’s sad because we lose things, but it’s beautiful because we gain things too. So don’t just sit back there & watch things change around you, feeling miserable. Change with them.
hi my name is emmaline(lean not line but spelled line). i’m 18 years old and i live in los angeles. my truth today is…i believe i am an asexual. i don’t wish to date a boy. nor a girl ever. i don’t know for how long these feelings will last and it may even sound stupid to some people but lately I’m just feeling like i don’t want to have that close feeling with another person. although i will always be in love with my ex boyfriend and in a heartbeat i probably would date him again, i do not want anyone else.
this is my truth. i am an asexual.
why is growing up so hard? i thought elementary school was the worse time of my life. boys had cooties and we’d all run from them. i’d always get in trouble for kissing a boy behind the play house. you believed you and your best friend would be friends forever. you planned your whole future. you got to high school. you grew boobs. i only wish boys had cooties but it’s worse. they have mood swings. everyone wants to fight or talk badly. why did no one warn me? i grew up thinking life was easy but it’s not. when i hurt my knee I thought that was unbearable but i fell in love…now that’s the worse pain.
i’m tired. i don’t want to be here anymore. it’s not fun, los angeles is my home but i want to find some place filled with adventure.