we are breakable

for today my truth will be…

i’m lonely, i feel like i have people but i’m alone but i’m not sad or depressed by it. i am actually happy. my state if mind is i’m alone but that’s okay because it’s not forever.

i could never date a boy who doesn’t do his own laundry. it’s not that hard you put them in the wash add soap and press start? if they are my age and still have their moms doing it that’s pretty lame.

so random but my friend and i are texting about this

When you realize it’s a dream you can afford to play. The same thing happens when you realize that ordinary life is a dream, just a movie, just a play. You don’t become more cautious, more timid, more reserved. You start jumping up and down and doing flips, precisely because it’s all a dream, it’s all pure Emptiness. You don’t feel less, you feel more - because you can afford to. You are no longer afraid of dying, and therefore you are not afraid of living. You become radical and wild, intense and vivid, shocking and silly. You let it all come pouring through, because it’s all your dream. Life then assumes its true intensity, its vivid luminosity, its radical effervescence.

It doesn’t matter if you have a boyfriend or a bunch of friends. If you’re lonely then you will feel lonely with or without these factors. They don’t change it. They don’t make you feel less alone. Loneliness doesn’t mean you don’t have people who love you, it just means you don’t feel it. It’s a state of mind, not reality.

Sometimes, there are things in our life that aren’t meant to stay. Sometimes, change may not be what we want. Sometimes, change is exactly what we need. And sometimes, saying goodbye is the hardest thing you think you’ll ever have to do, but sometimes, saying hello again is the thing that breaks you down and makes you more vulnerable than you ever thought possible. Sometimes, change is too much to bear. But most of the time, change is the only thing saving your life.

People worry too much about what’s going to happen next. That’s what religion is. It’s just a name for worrying about what happens when we’re done living. If you’re worrying about what happens after you die, you never get to really live.

there’s that song that’s always in your head. every day dream there is that song that sparks them. or there is that song you can’t get out of your head. it bugs you until you finally figure it out and oh how happy you are when you do. then there is that song that reminds you of them. has nothing to do with them or maybe it was “your” song and it comes in your head without warning. it breaks you, as it beats between your ribs almost crushing them. thoughts of what you had haunt you. memories of what you miss. that one song. it can completely crush you or maybe it makes you smile. maybe it turns your whole day around. or there is that song that is exactly how you’re feeling, and you think it must have been written for you because every word is your life in 3 minutes and a few seconds. songs songs. it’s just that one song. it has completely broke me today.

you’re that one song. you are everything that i thought i wanted but knew i’d never have. you are that song that has me ready to bang my head against the wall. ready to cry. ready to daydream.

put put your heart where your mouth is…i’ll take take take take you down.

I wish that we could be friends again. I miss your presence and our countless-hour talks that have been replaced with countless hours of awkward silence.

it’s been said that there is one word that will free us from the weight and pain of life.  and that word is love. i believe that. that doesn’t mean it hasn’t been hard, or that it won’t be. it just means that i’ve found stillness and bravery in myself when i’m with you. you make me brave and i will love you until the end of time.

i love love love love love love love love you <3

hmm well i am happy. it took awhile but i am. i don’t miss anyone or regret anything. working has helped me a lot and i love everyone i work with. hate coming home. and smelling like coffee all the time but having money is nice. went shopping yesterday and i still have money left over. my life has done a 360. I went from thinking this boy was my life to realizing i don’t like relationships. i love being on my own. coming home just to a dog and a quiet house(until my mom comes home -_-) everything is fine. i love my life. it’s a first.

go meeee :D

i hope you’re as happy as me. congrats on getting a girlfriend ;)

i’m so happy <3