I GOT MY NEW ID CARD AND I HATE IT. THEY CHANGED IT NOW. IT USE TO BE SIDE WAYS NOW ITS UPWARD. WTF. AND ITS A CLOSE UP OF YOUR FACE WHEN IT USE TO SHOW YOU FACE AND SOME CHEST. NOW MY FACE LOOKS LIKE I WEIGHT 300 POUNDS. well……i got my id card. I’M NOT POOR ANYMORE. YAY.
Awkward moments define me. I’d sleep all day if I could. Ilack the capability to keep my mouth closed. Yeah, everyone has bad days, I just have more frequent ones. If you don’t like me, don’t act like you do; it really won’t offend me. I’ve made mistakes, I’ve let people take advantage of me, and I have accepted way less than I deserve.
I’d trade everything to have you here. I’d give up everything for the feeling I feel when I’m with you. If I can’t feel it again, then I don’t know what I’d do. Your scent, the feel of your skin against mine, the soft kisses on these warm summer nights. This is what I waited my whole life for. And I’m going to spend my entire life searching for a moment where I feel it again. And this time, when I find it, I’ll never let it get away from me. I will hold him in my arms and take in everything he is. I will feel in love and have a smile that no one else can replace.
The greatest irony of love; loving the right person at the wrong time, having the wrong person when the time is right and finding out you love someone right after that person walks out of your life. And sometimes, you think you’re already over a person, but when you see them smile at you, you’ll suddenly realize that you’re just pretending to be over them just to ease the pain of knowing that they will never be yours again. For some, they think that letting go is one way of expressing how much they love that person. Some are afraid to see the one they love being held by someone else. Most relationships tend to fail not because the absence of love. Love is always present. It’s just that one was being loved too much and the other was being love too little. As we all know that the heart is the center of the body but it beats on the left. Maybe that’s the reason why the heart is not always right. Most often we fall in love with the person we think we love but to only discover that for them, we are just for passing time while the one who truly loves us remains either a friend or a stranger. So here’s a piece of advice; let go when you’re hurting too much, give up when love isn’t enough, and move on when things are not like before. For sure there is someone out there who will love you even more.
“You’ll never make it alone (Let it go, I’m not leaving) You’ve always been on your own (Not going, I’m not kissing you goodbye) You’ll never make it alone (On my own, I’m nothing,)”—The Used Men Are All The Same
I’m at the point in my life where things are neither good or bad. They could be better, but they could be worse and I can’t look at anything with a purely pessimistic or optimistic point of view. It’s that point in life where you just have to forge forward and hope for the best. You keep your fingers crossed in hopes that someday catching that happiness you tried so hard to hold in your grasp. That’s the thing about happiness, it is fleeting. Like that firefly you try to capture and no matter how many times you waver, try to clasp it in your hands, but it never wants to be kept. Keep one foot in front of the other and move along, because someday that firefly will find it’s way back to you.